new in town: Mississippi Studios

Hey kids, get your fake IDs ready because there's a new venue in town! Despite their ridiculous and uncouth 21+ policy, it seems to be worth some investigative effort. Newly renovated with a seating capacity of 150 and a standing capacity of 250 (apparently you can fit in nearly 50% more people if everyone just stands up, a pretty nifty party trick), Mississippi Studios' grand reopening celebration takes place on Wednesday, March 4, at 3939 N Mississippi (7 pm to midnight, free). Bands will include Weinland, Rebecca Gates, Pete Krebs, the Dimes, James Low, Chris Robley, Stephanie Schneiderman, Lewi Longmire, and Portland Cello Project. To find out more visit MississippiStudious and if you're not as broke as I am and can afford a ticket (about $15) visit their BoxOffice.


-mh

$7 billion bailout

Look there on the ground. Is that a dime? Shit if I’ve ever seen one. Quick pick it up. That’s worth at least 10 cents. Oh no, there’s some gum stuck to FDR’s face. Who cares, it’s a DIME! You’ll be 10 cents richer!

These hard economic times are hurting us all, and just like Sarah Palin, I am ill! I even contemplated gathering my measly possessions into a handkerchief bindle and bumming around Burnside for spare change with a sign that reads [broke college student]. Heck, I haven’t even bought a legitimate concert ticket in the month of October. GASP! But don’t panic, I may not be able to see Russia from my house, but I certainly have one sure-fire solution that’s not even on Palin’s radar.

For only a $6 buck cover you can catch one decent show at the Artistery on SE Division. Last last Friday I crowed into the basement venue for an energizing night of Tango Alpha Tango. And let’s just say that for $6 bucks I’ll pay to see someone kick their guitar (literally) again! So avoid the panhandling, defeat the second coming of the great depression, rub it in Palin’s face, and check out the Artistery (you may even have money left over to buy some Tango Alpha Tango)!

-mh

The Roseland

Nestled in between a homeless hangout and a strip club, the Roseland is a nice little music venue only about 2 blocks from pioneer square. At first look from the inside, it looks like a pretty crappy place thats falling apart. And although it kinda is falling apart, it is also an awesome place. The whole place, including the stage, can probably fit inside stamm comfortably. Although this forces there to be way less available ticket slots, it also means your so close to your favorite bands that you can practically fondle them. Speaking of fondleing, here are a few of the problems with the roseland. 1) the fondleing. You get fondled. Although some people don't mind, i find it odd when a drunk chick you dont know runs up, grabs your ass, and bites your nipple. True story. 2) the younglings. There are alot of middle schoolers and high schoolers. Depending on the show, thats not so bad, but its kinda wierd looking at these kids in sluttly clothes and having them eye you with foul intentions (repember folks, they may seem fun, but its a felony! :D ). and finally, the worst thing about the roseland, 3) the bouncers. some of them are nice, alot of them are dicks. Go to any kind of show where there is moshing and croud surfing, and they get a bit ruough. I've seen them kick the shit out of people for no reason, other than they got thrown forward and they were super happy about that. But those problems aside, the tickets are cheap (15-30), and since its so small, most bands dont have a problem coming into the crowd and signing stuff (after everyones calmed down a bit, of course). Its probably my favorite venue in portland, and I suggest you check it out. (ticketswest.com, search Roseland).

Grant,
the Hi-there-I'm-OH-GOD-YOU-KICKED-MY-TEETH-IN